God

Lord I am here sitting in this little flat
i have at times dripped like a soggy sponge of spilling emotion
they are not so much vague memories so much as unrealized dreams
instead of the marriage and the wonderful exhibitions i have walking and murals and
a piano .newer ways and yet vulnerable as all thoughts and burstable thinks bubbles are

my friends have given me money bought me food
they have given sermons from church altar and cafe chair and car journey and coastal wlk and i have listened gartefully to their companionship
i dare not think of the joy pathos knindness and shared advnture of tom and the two arthurs of art and print and ceramics and oh this theatre set college life i once had with the encouragement of John Martin's exceptional intuitive guitar playing fantastic.

so then to go for a walk and to pray beyond all hope for your blessing on my finfances on my c.v. and on my maps of the roamn empire of my son and daughter on this father's day when i would if i could send some encouragement and gratitude to both them and to Norma


water under the bridge no the river of God's your provision for us all
i pray for alison and for steve whitby too
times have been hard and my heart has been sheltering in its hard shell and now hardship

what is that a hard ship one that sinks presumably lord help me with boat and umbrella aof the hioly spirit amen i like loise morgans website may i produce work as good as her for i find it wonderful amen


shoul di trust julia cameron's encouragement and just keep writing /it seem in no time at all the hope of the izzy pop stories and the wifi location of blue spotty teapot has gone but i still want to continue with my enthusiasm and courtship my dancing piano playing and my hope snoozy and diamond books seem to have folded like a deckchair on a beach i no longer want to realx upon unable to trust the blessing they at first appeared to be .oh for a more sincere and longer lasting partnership
so nice at first erik's enthusuiasm and my speedy cheap roughs for the most naieve of christian faith seeeds diamonds oh well it all folds on the deckchair on the beach that i no longer rtust to be kindly in its sunlight companionship and sense of family oh the poor children lord bless them and keep them alive to the possibilitiy as I am so sad that the fellowsip of southport college and my rising to leadership with printmaking and interiors i was fulfilled and i feel a kindly encouraging and enthusuiastic tutor -all i feel in many ways stolen from me

oh the joy of finding inspirational things to share in the college library and inmy heart and intht building when it was first offerd to us to do something new alive and fresh with jane gardner and bob and neil and diane what a team of inspirational kindness with ian the technician and john the photgraphic technician and skilled man too.oh the titin joy of it all the hopefulness and niccki too.still all was not as it should be one fire escaped from another threatening to flare up and all bathsheba like under the premise of i am in love yet the romantic firwork of a suspect movie evaporated and the outside the baths ready for an exciting holiday dip became a zoo trip with more of an elephant house chovel and brush oh how sad that the energy that once was for cakes and saws and badges and burning line and industry fell completely apart with cigarettes vanity and leather jackets and occupational health and them and us acroos the raod and patoral care that couldn' truly care no not at all oh amen