Sunday, 22 January 2012

one big goal

one that is so good it shows you what God's love is for you
God loves you
that is why you are at all
to know this love is to have fulfilled your greatest of all possible dreams
to make sense to yourself
to ntruly love others
to belss them with this affirmative good news
i am important
you are important we are important
the creator of us me you and more important
all things and thingyness with which are lives are made abundant wonderful wholesome
can i think of the best gift in the world
then can i receive it
unblock its arrival give brith to it
digs deep for it work hard for it
or even let go and wait gently patiently trustingly for it
then with wonder and awe trustingly fluidly encouragingly whilst encouraged to
and encouraged complete relingquish my grip grasp and neediness of it and give it to you unknown needy
yet blessed and lovely

the rver of breathing feeling caring being

working on preparing to coach a friend creatively
in prearaing i am tuning up with books like feel the fear and do it anyway
i recall but no longer own the book
that she had me take a large piece of paper and fill it with the minutiae
of things that i love to do
then with this favourite things to do sheet
realise that if one or two go there are lots of others
this is a sheet of abundant gratitude
oh the range of suggestions to give another that good books have offered me
is th bible one yes
but and it is a big but just like the
treasurer who philip went alongside if i remember correctly
how can i know what i am reading withput someone telling me
the feet of the one that does goes into the marketplace with bliss bestowing seeing drawing skills like dr frederick franck's zen of seeing
or sark's olaytfulness
or ortberg of lucado 's joyful wonder of expression
van morrison's whuy
 cant it be like this all the time

isobel poppy and mary isobel
mother author and grandaughter seed
what wonder this world because of the kindness cookery and gift of rascal the dog
and your influence on a pratical playful childlike flawed but loveable father jim mine
isobel you will eventually settl in to a life so wonderful with ever expanding gifts and i wont be here but will have prohesied simply that you will be a detective and a pathologist of all that is good and holy
one of those was this great grand mother and you own grand mother too |norma is good
a hurting girl bruised by belfast and a triangle of blaming and insecure comparisons and competitions
into wondering about herslf and her own blessedness still managed to keep going
she found me freed me got me answers to prayer theatre study theatre sets tree house rabbit hutches univerity degrees and bore me you daddy who loves me did a great job and will love you so much too

woo this is more than i could have dreamed possible and then there is your auntie amy who is such a wonderful daughter like your mum caring and searchignand providing and becoming strong rseilient resourceful and blessed
inspired and supportive of rob brother husband kind gent playful inventive child wow

my dad was my hero he built circus props was a mechanic and a driver to a doctor a cabby and an entrepreneur del boy owner of two archades filled with money gobbling machine tool maker valve for hearts made form lead pencil amatteur magician joker comic mender of others cars a star in the orbit of my childhood a humble portrait made by stanley spencer and lucian freud something of their narrative and suchness paintings is who he was and is and he converted a shed and put holes in its walls kept canaries a simple loving sole mender of church building
man of godliness gentle giant transformed broken heart snooker player ex raf mystery man blackpool man
wihth it sea side tat but with the lobve story of isabel silver service waitress

plot planning an imaginary life for a fictitiious version of you on the wall of 19c church road
so far i have put a 2012 empty year planner beneath  a clues to solution time line with interuptions some of the onbstacel having determied the culprit you find the thief of the m and s bag in the bookshop when i sat down to invent this version of you in notingham at christmas

some stuff  your dad creates a bag the can look full seem transparent yet you control the contents visul with your phone

i doscvovered that the latest sort of moomin comic strip is not by tove but by her brother lars io think
i bough boots as well for walking

my phone alarm just went off this is a nother of robs gadgets my old heis old mobile phone
so here i am writing about an imaginary gismo whilst typing on the netbook he gave me  and interupted by the other gismo he gave me many years ago

i remmeber a lovely momnet on that mobile phone when i beleieved barbnar loved me and she truly was matisse like girl rosie noteworthy elegenat
i remember a storm so powerful yet we were able to be together through that little mobeile mariied haerat in times little pocket gift frm god
pocket sized heart sized small whilst in cvast storm through satellite back to earth in gods timeless time of timelessness memory of joy thrill spill and wholeness of true being

a halllelujah

and please god increase my your the territoy of love jabez pain prayer of hope

i had an email someone owns the etched plate of the elephent poem dont think i have th plate anymore but she wanted a value and framed i said about £120

julia cameron wants the reader to write affirmations
i am affirming that i beleive the work i do has value
is bleassed and is a blessing to me
i would like frederick fid like to affirm gratidue for all those who inspire me kless chagall
sendak searle steadman in the kids book fly away peter the ahlbergs

today i play bass in chrurch and so i will now practice on siad bass after bath and breakfast
this has been my morning pages
let me review the list of things she suggests for th first week
mine are thursday to thursday
started in hotel

my dream and my expereince is one of life coaching assocaition there iwth john haynes and others in 2008
i think it was time goes so fast wheel of lif includes

spiritual familysocial personal development career attitude health financial home tangibles leisure and recreation

so then juilia cameron first week objectives

number 8
imaginary lives
author scuba diver
detective crime writer crime fighter mystrey writer fiddle player bass player vdancer soap opera star sculptor mr benn
scientist if you had 5 other lives to lead what would you do in each of them

captain of a fishing boat in st ives
blues singer
whatever occures to you jot it down
choose one and make a micromovement towards it this week

10 take your artist for a walk-brisk 20 minute

8 write a letter to a long lost mentor-someone who encouraged you mail it to yourelsf or if they are available write it to them

6 find three such encouragers from your pst
record recall beleive every compliment

there are other things these are just some seeds 

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